Disorder in the Court

[ShArP]

These are from a book called Disorder in the Court, and are

things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and

now published by

court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while

these exchanges were actually taking place.

Q: What is your date of birth?

A: July 15th.

Q: What year?

A: Every year.

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?

A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.

Q: How long has he lived with you?

A: Forty-five years.

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Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he

woke up that morning?

A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

Q: And why did that upset you?

A: My name is Susan.

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Q: How was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death.

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Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a

deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

__________________________________

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for

a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you

began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.