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  #1  
Old 03-03-2005, 09:17 AM
bigsmellyfart is offline bigsmellyfart
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Wink Federal No Child Left Behind Act

In response to the Federal No Child Left Behind Act,
students will have to pass the test to be promoted
to the next grade level. In the hopes that it will
be uniformly adopted by all the states, thus
illuminating Texas to a glorious front runner
position in education, it will be called: the
Federal Arithmetic and Reading Test (FART).

All students who cannot pass a FART in the second
grade will be retested in grades 3-5 until such a
time as they are capable of achieving a FART score
of 80%. If a student does not successfully FART by
grade 5, that student shall be placed in a separate
English program, the Special Means Elective for
Learning Language (SMELL).

If with this increased SMELL program the student
cannot pass the required FART, he or she can
graduate to middle school by taking a one-semester
course in Comprehensive Reading and Arithmetic
Preparation (CRAP).

If by age fourteen the student cannot FART, SMELL or
CRAP, he or she will earn a promotion in an
intensive one-week seminar. This is the Preparatory
Reading for Unprepared Nationally Exempted
Students(PRUNES).

It is the opinion of the Texas Department of Public
Instruction that an intensive week of PRUNES will
enable any student to FART, SMELL or CRAP.


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  #2  
Old 03-03-2005, 09:23 AM
DevilDog#1 is offline DevilDog#1

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Posts: 7,040

LMFAO! G1
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  #3  
Old 03-03-2005, 02:09 PM
atholon is offline atholon
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That is good LOL!
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  #4  
Old 03-03-2005, 05:11 PM
Dr. Bullet is offline Dr. Bullet

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Hehehe
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