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Humor & Jokes Got a funny joke or a funny email? Post it so we can all laugh! |
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#1
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ONLY IN AMERICA
Passing this along.......enjoy!
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. > 2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. > 3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. > 4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. > 5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. > 6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. > 7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. > 8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. > 9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. > 10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
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On making your way through LIFE become a WARRIOR & a HUNTER & Know that DEATH is the last WITNESS. |
#2
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> 10. Only in America......do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. for gotting one; banks drive thur with ATM were one can't reach them out the driver door have to open the door to get to the ATM and get rob real easy only in the USA a Drive thur ATM fast service robbier.
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* altnews sources [getmo & others news] not found main FNN: realrawnews.com *Discord: Unknown77#7121 Playing now days: EA Games> swtor [star wars old republic] |
#3
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>11. Only in America can you get a beer at a drive thru liquor store!!!
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#4
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in only in
America one can buy a Rifle or order all their parts by mail order catlog to make one up from nothen at all.
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* altnews sources [getmo & others news] not found main FNN: realrawnews.com *Discord: Unknown77#7121 Playing now days: EA Games> swtor [star wars old republic] |
#5
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Quote:
This makes no sence...
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#6
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yea it dose
think about it drive thur Full ATM robbie service with fast service.
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* altnews sources [getmo & others news] not found main FNN: realrawnews.com *Discord: Unknown77#7121 Playing now days: EA Games> swtor [star wars old republic] |
#7
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lol
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#8
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errr...u understand SB
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#9
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I don't understand either...
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#10
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Although the 1 does make the most scense,
the rest are lmao quality.
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#11
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man some of you all are lost???
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* altnews sources [getmo & others news] not found main FNN: realrawnews.com *Discord: Unknown77#7121 Playing now days: EA Games> swtor [star wars old republic] |
#12
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Only in america people die from smoking guns, instead of smoking cigarettes!
greatings from the Neatherlands (near Amsterdam)
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#13
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only in america cop's get a call about a blind peeping tom
Story (really happen) Mr Horta accused his next-door neighbor Mr.Kuan of spying on his wife when she undressed for the shower and the angry husband vowed to shoot mr. Kuan on sight.Fortunately the whole thing pass over Because,as it seem's the cops pointed out, Mr.Kuan is Legally blind. can't see a thing at all. man bet he really feel like a J-ck--s after the cops told him
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* altnews sources [getmo & others news] not found main FNN: realrawnews.com *Discord: Unknown77#7121 Playing now days: EA Games> swtor [star wars old republic] Last edited by Hellfighter; 04-17-2003 at 03:39 AM. |
#14
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I understood what the Chief meant, One of certain criminals favorite past times is to wait until you get your money from the drive thru ATM then they walk up to your car window and rob you. Hehehe I'm a Cop it really happens lol.
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#15
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uh oh, we got a 5-0. lol
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#16
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Yep. I protect those who can't protect themselves. Oh wait crap!!!! Who's gonna protect me ??? Poop
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#17
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quick man, put that out..........
somebody spray some lysol or something.........
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Look what the "Devil" made me do! I have lost my mind, can you help me? Send Siggies.............. Mark 8:34-38 And he called to him the multitude with his disciples, and said to them, "If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it;and whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel's will save it. For what does it profit a man, to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? For what can a man give in return for his life? For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, of him will the Son of man also be ashamed, when he comes in the glory of his Father with the holy angels." |
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